I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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