what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
