he shaved USA in his pubs
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Randomize
