we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
