seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Randomize
