just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
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