And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Randomize
