I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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