Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
