wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
