she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize