something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
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