he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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