girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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