Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
It's blow job season.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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