god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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