I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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