it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
