god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
