just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
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