I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
honey bunches of taint.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
