Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
