make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize