Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Randomize