what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
