I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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