I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
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