How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
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