Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
