There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
