My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
