This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
you didnt know i had herpes?
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Randomize
