That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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