And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
So much Jack, so little girl.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Randomize
