I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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