I want to stick my p in your. b.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
