its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Randomize
