i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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