Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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