So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
