so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
