you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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