There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
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