Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
