Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
