Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
