the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
