Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Randomize
