Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
