My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Slut skills are useful in every country.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize