I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
